Five Keys To Educate In Peace

A child is not born violent by nature. His attitudes and behaviors are shaped as he develops emotionally in interaction with his main attachment figures. For this reason, undoubtedly, educating in peace is a task that begins in the family.

This family nucleus is the infant’s first socializing agent. Within it you will learn values ​​and ways of behaving and reacting to what surrounds you. If we want to live in a peaceful and caring world, let us begin by taking responsibility for the education of future generations. So that they have enough emotional intelligence not to resort to violence.

Five keys to educate in peace

Each family carries out the upbringing according to what it considers most appropriate based on the ideals it wishes to convey. However, this is not always an easy task. For this reason, we propose below five guidelines to educate your children in peace.

1. Set an example

We often endeavor to lecture the little ones about what they should and should not do. Obviously, it is important to provide them with guidelines for conduct and their consequent justification. But we must remember that children do what they see, not what they hear.

Thus, it is important that you watch your own reactions. If you use yelling or hitting to correct your child and lose your temper, don’t expect a different reaction from the child himself. Begin to develop your patience, your assertiveness, and your communication skills to deal with difficult situations. So your child will see in you a healthier, more adequate and functional way of responding to the environment.

2. Referents who provide love and affection

To educate a child in peace, it is essential to ensure that they have loving and positive references, who provide them with love and understanding. Of course, parents will be the first figures to take on this task. But it is also necessary for the child to establish safe and harmonious relationships with other adults. 

A child who grows up feeling loved, understood, and supported will not feel the need to resort to violence. Through your relationships with others, you will have understood that the world is a safe place and that people can be trusted. You will have integrated a relationship style based on respect, acceptance and dialogue, as it is what you will have received from the people around you.

3. Empathy is essential to educate in peace

If we were able to truly put ourselves in the shoes of the other, violent behavior would be greatly reduced. Many of the physical and verbal aggressions occur because whoever emits them is blinded by their own circumstances, trying to defend themselves and without thinking about the repercussions it will cause on others.

To help children develop empathy we have to carry out constant work based on daily actions. For example, if your child hits another child in the park, there is little use in immediately forcing him to apologize. Better try to dialogue with him, invite him to think about how that other child will feel, and let him understand that he has hurt and decide to apologize for it.

4. Increase your self-esteem

Sometimes violence responds to a lack of confidence in oneself and a low positive evaluation. Those who have a healthy self-esteem will hardly need to resort to harm or humiliation to relate socially. So make sure your children develop healthy self-esteem and have a high self-concept. To achieve this, encourage them to take on challenges, accompany them in their falls and congratulate them on their achievements. Self-esteem has to be based on your own proof that you are capable, not on empty flattery.

5. Pay attention to them

Lastly, don’t ignore your child’s violent or aggressive behaviors. If these appear it is not by chance, something is failing in their emotional development. Then pay attention to the little one, talk to him, discover the origin of his fear and be patient to help him change his behaviors.

If you do not see yourself capable of doing it alone, do not hesitate to turn to a specialist. He will be able to provide you with guidelines that will help redirect your child to peaceful behavior and, above all, to his own well-being.